Tag Archives: Road Rage

It’s Called a Passing Lane for a Reason


It’s common knowledge. I didn’t make up the name or the law. It’s a real thing. It’s a road for driving past slower vehicles, People. According to this law, “Slower traffic must keep right.”

Yet, for some reason there are those out there that completely disregard this law. I am King of the Land. Laws do not apply to me.

This is the person that decides they will be the one deeming the speed that all of the losers behind them will be going from this day forward as they have been self-appointed as the headmaster, the leader of the ceremony, the gatekeeper themselves over where you want to be…in front of them.

This person has decided no longer will this lane be used as an avenue to get around a slower vehicle. It is now for the vehicle that most certainly is above the law. You and your need to get to your destination before Jesus comes back means nothing to them.

This lane will now serve the purpose of pissing off drivers (aware of traffic laws (and etiquette) for miles. Those drivers will be bewildered, will be driven to curse, will conjure up sinful thoughts of running the New Sheriff in Town off the road and watching his vehicle fill with plumes of smoke as it rolls end over end exploding into tiny bits of metal that rain down all around its mangle carcass…too much…?

Just when I feel bad about those thoughts, I think about this.

Try to pass this person.

You have finally obtained a glorious window of opportunity to pass His Majesty, but he has suddenly decided to do a reenactment of a scene from The Fast and The Furious as if the thought of you passing him is so unbearable that he will now go the rate of speed to match yours–not a mile under…while acting completely oblivious and refusing to look at you.

That’s all you had to do to begin with you moron.

I always wonder if these people are the same kids in school that always wanted to be at the front of the line? You see the one, holding both arms out as if to warn all others to stay behind…or else.

This person will not be outdone. In fact to prove it, as he concedes and grants you permission to move forward with your life, he sends you off with a lovely hand gesture…

Winner.


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