Awkward Moments

embarrassed-smiley-face-1

Have you ever just made an absolute ass of yourself and thought, Why the hell did I just do that?  What an idiot!?

Of course you have. Why is awkwardness and embarrassment two of the things we go through huge extents to avoid? I mean I would truly rather sit through a three hour Pentecostal revival than get embarrassed. Well, that’s kind of an oxymoron…snake-handlers-1

Anyhoo, I have a zillion and one stories to share about stupidity.  It’s like I lose any bit of sense the good Lord gave me at fairly regular intervals in my life.

For instance, I told a guy at Marshalls who was carrying all these clothes around and replacing them on racks that this hanger with this dress on it was broken and should I just hang it back up.  He said, “I guess.”  What????

Ok, so clearly when his mother walked over and dumped another pile of clothes on him I realized he was not a salesperson, but just a sweet son.  They exchanged some sweet little diddy in Chinese, had a few giggles, and stared at me, and I just continued to hold my head high like I would ask that very question to any shopper in that store that day.  “Hey, do you think I should hang this broken hanger back up?  Hey you over there, what do you think?”

One time, after a quick little restroom break, I walked down the aisle in front of an entire church congregation with my skirt neatly tucked into my underwear.  Do ya think anyone said to me before I made it to the second row—“Hey! Dumb-ass your skirt’s tucked into your underwear.” Of course not!

The fantastic thing is that these memories aren’t from the olden days.  Just a week ago I was on a flight trying to listen to a few Itunes on my laptop and not being able to hear them well in my headset I turned them all the way up.  Well, when husband turns dramatically toward me looking at me as though I just murdered a small child, I realize I didn’t even have the damn things plugged in. So, the whole plane got to enjoy a little Divinyls I Touch Myself. (Good grief)

Whatever……I can shake it off.  I’m cool.  I mean I have to be because I know that I will do something stupid again, and I will be mortified.

About Amy Rafferty Slagle

I am a middle school teacher juggling career, husband (ooh la la), and twin tomboys (good grief). I have a passion for writing and crave laughter just about as much as frozen yogurt. This is my attempt at sharing the madness of my world, my mind, and my humor. View all posts by Amy Rafferty Slagle

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